Released back in 2018, Maggie Lindemann's "Would I" is a raw exploration of self-doubt, insecurity, and the weight of expectations. The song captures that feeling of growing older and realizing that life’s challenges don’t necessarily get easier. Maggie’s lyrics reveal her struggle with emotional numbness and the pressure to conform, all while questioning her place in the world.
Aging and Disillusionment: The opening lines, "I thought if I was older / I'd have less on my shoulders," reflect the disillusionment with the idea that maturity would bring relief. Instead, it’s a struggle with sadness, boredom, and life's burdens.
Emotional Numbness and Substance Use: "Most nights I am not sober / L.A.'s making me colder" suggests using substances to cope, leading to detachment and coldness. The persistent "voices I can't ignore" indicate ongoing mental and emotional struggles.
Insecurity and Fear of Love: The song highlights insecurities and fear of love, admitting these have prevented fully embracing love and caused hurt: "If I wasn't so insecure / If I wasn't easy to hurt then I wouldn't hurt ya."
Peer Pressure and Self-Questioning: The repeated question, "If all of my friends wanted to jump / Would I, would I?" illustrates uncertainty and susceptibility to peer pressure, questioning whether to follow others down a destructive path, or set out and lead your own.
Materialism and Lack of Fulfillment: "Empty numbers on paychecks / Good days only on weekends" criticize the hollowness of chasing material success. Despite achievements ("A-plus, call me a genius"), there's a feeling of meaninglessness and lack of satisfaction.
Endless Longing: The recurring phrase "Everything is never enough" underscores perpetual dissatisfaction. No matter the achievements or experiences, there’s a constant sense of something missing
“Would I” is a vivid portrayal of the emotional struggles that many face but seldom discuss openly. The blend of poignant lyrics and evocative visuals makes this track a standout piece in Maggie Lindemann’s discography, a throwback that still resonates deeply today.